Sound choices

Be diligent to present yourself approved to God, a worker who does not need to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. 2 Timothy 2:15

Making wise choices can be difficult, yet as followers of Jesus, we have an ever-dependable resource to discern the best choice. The Spirit of God living within us will help us discern the truth and application of God’s Word for our lives. Yet, reverence is required as we approach divinely inspired Scripture. The Bible is not to be toyed with as a book of wisdom to justify irreverent behavior; rather, the very words are laced with the love of the Lord to be meditated on and digested into our being. And with this attitude of holy worship, we are approved by God. 

Timothy’s mentor, Paul, clearly states that diligence to first submit to and be approved by God is necessary to hear and understand God. Just as we are diligent in our work and relationships to be thorough and to love well, even more so, we must consistently invest time and energy in understanding timeless truths. Diligent study waits, prays, and pursues God’s wisdom to understand and apply the best choices. God blesses a life that desires choices that honor Christ.

Wisdom based on God’s truth becomes yours through study and suffering. Not just saying out loud what someone else said, but allowing the Spirit to embed truth into your very being. Oswald Chambers speaks to this idea of owning your own truth,

Your position is not really yours until you make it yours through suffering and study. The author or speaker from whom you learn the most is not the one who teaches you something you didn’t know before, but the one who helps you take a truth with which you have quietly struggled, give it expression, and speak it clearly and boldly. 

Indeed, truth struggled over becomes wisdom you can apply to make wise choices. 

I am learning that life and the Lord sometimes limit my choices. Financial limitations, time limitations, capacity limitations, physical limitations, or limitations from adhering to values and principles core to who I am in Christ. The benefit of having limited choices is not being overwhelmed by too many options or being tempted to do something that would not have the best outcomes over time. Does buying more stuff really align with God’s best, or is my financial limitation of not being able to afford extra assets protecting me from not missing out on better opportunities to serve others or love my family in a less distracted manner? If a job opportunity requires more time or travel than I have the capacity, then it is better to say no and trust the Lord will open another door in His timing. The Spirit speaks through my limitations, so embracing the wisdom of this guarded reality is wise. Limitations focus and help me better discern God’s best. 

So maybe you self-impose some limitations on your life, so your decision-making is set up for success. Screen time requires guardrails if you want to grow relationally healthy with your family, friends, and colleagues. Food and drink invite you into overindulgence without rules of engagement for your consumption habits. I admire the Orthodox faith tradition that follows a regular routine of fasting throughout the year to draw closer to God. Orthodox leader Father Stavros N. Akrotirianakis shares his fasting sentiments. “Fasting is not about giving up something only to get it back. Fasting is about getting control of our passions, maintaining control over them, and ultimately giving control of ourselves to God.” Perhaps the Lord is leading you into a rhythm of regular fasting to be set free from fleshly passions to be more passionate in your spiritual pursuits. Making wise choices is a blend of your part and God’s part. Stay humble and teachable, and choose Christ first, and the Spirit will lead you to wise choices.

Luxury Lust

I will tear down my barns and build bigger ones, and there I will store my surplus grain. And I’ll say to myself, ‘You have plenty of grain laid up for many years. Take life easy; eat, drink and be merry.’ But God said to him, ‘You fool! This very night your life will be demanded from you. Then who will get what you have prepared for yourself?’ This is how it will be with whoever stores up things for themselves but is not rich toward God. Luke 12:18-21

Lust for luxury is the natural progression of a cultural craze for more things. This materialistic addiction is never satisfied, as it wants just a little bit more. Relationships are patronized, sacrificed and neglected for the purpose of material gain. Image, not intimacy, is what’s valued by those discontent unless they are able to upgrade. Ironically, insecurity drives this abnormal notion of security they strive in vain to achieve.

Bigger is not always better, because bigger brings complexity, not simplicity. Bigger requires added cost for upkeep and attention. What starts out as a desire for something nice can get out of hand and became a hindrance, instead of a help. A bigger bank account, a bigger house and a bigger car can become a distraction to God’s purposes.

“But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction” (1Timothy 6:6-9).

Covetousness can creep up on us like a lion stalking prey. When startled, we finally come to our senses, but find ourselves in the clutch of debt’s grip. The remedy for a rich man’s ruckus is found in being rich toward God. Our identity is not in the abundance of our possessions, who we “are” is defined by the abundance of our life in Christ.

What does it mean to be rich toward God? It means that wealth brings faith to a soul, not folly. Treasures are not meant to be stored for self, but in service to the Lord and others. Filthy lucre on earth is replaced with eternal reward in heaven. The wealth of the next world is pursued over the wealth of this world, when Christ captivates a heart.

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Luke 12:34).

Therefore, resolve to the wise way of engaging God and His purpose for your life. Avoid the mind games that money plays on foolish souls, seek instead valid security in Jesus. Determine to build a bigger belief in the Lord and a smaller perception of stuff. Soul fulfillment comes from building the Kingdom of God and His righteousness.

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” (Matthew 6:33).

1st things 1st

 First Things First

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matthew 6:33

Whenever I feel like my life is out of sync, I have to be reminded of what my priorities are. It is

so easy to get consumed by everyone else’s agenda around you. You can feel like you have

accomplished nothing although you have been busy all week. Beloved, I must be honest with

you. It is not material things I want most from God. I want what money cannot buy. I want

God’s righteousness, His peace, His joy, His love, His purity and perfection, His mind, His

kingdom. I am at a place in my life where I don’t have time for foolish pursuits and wasted time

on people who just want to play with life. I want to be everything God ordained for me to be. In

order for that to occur, I must put the first things first.

Our verse tells us to seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness. Sounds like a

big chase doesn’t it? How can I go after something I cannot see? How can I be motivated to

pursue something I have never touched? The kingdom of God and his righteousness cannot be

obtained physically nor through my intellect. I must open my heart and mind and pray for God

to come in. Our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit according to I Corinthians 6:19. The

temple is the place God wants to dwell. The first thing I must do is invite Him in. I can simply

pray, “Lord you are welcomed in my mind, body, and soul. I totally surrender all of me to you

this day in Jesus’ name, AMEN.” Beloved if you pray like this today, you are putting first things

first. Then all of the other things that Matthew 6 alludes to will be yours.

Let Him in

 To the Church in Laodicea ] “To the angel of the church in Laodicea write: These are the words

of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the ruler of God’s creation. Here I am! I stand at the

door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with that

person, and they with me. Revelation 3:14,20 

We simply have to let Jesus in. He is so faithful to his word to always be standing at the doors of our hearts knocking. When we didn’t love ourselves, he was at the door knocking. When we had no regard for his love, he was at the door knocking.

When I was deep in my sins, he was at my door knocking. The angel of the church in Laodicea

was giving these words to John while he was on the prison island of Patmos. The angel said that

these words are of the Amen, the faithful and true witness, the ruler of God’s creation. The angel

was telling John whose words were these.

These are the words of Jesus beloved. He stands at the door today still knocking. In the

day you hear His voice, harden not your heart. Please let Him in. He desires fellowship with His

creation. He died for us just so that he could come in. He was beaten for us so that He could

come in. He shed His blood so that He could come in. He gives you and I the power however to

open the door. You have a choice to keep the door shut. But, I beg you today by the mercies of

God, please open the door and let Jesus in to stay for good. Don’t let Him just be a visitor.

Let Him remain forever.

See the good

You have heard that it has been said, ‘You must love your neighbor and hate those who hate you.’ But I tell you, love those who hate you. (*Respect and give thanks for those who say bad things to you. Do good to those who hate you.) Pray for those who do bad things to you and who make it hard for you. Then you may be the sons of your Father Who is in heaven. His sun shines on bad people and on good people. He sends rain on those who are right with God and on those who are not right with God. Matthew 5:43-45

Martin Luther King, Jr. said these words in his sermon, Love Your Enemies, preached in 1957 at The Howard University

The person who hates you most has some good in him; even the nation that hates you most has some good in it; even the race that hates you most has some good in it. And when you come to the point that you look in the face of every man and see deep down within him what religion calls “the image of God,” you begin to love him in spite of what he does; you see God’s image there. There is an element of goodness that he can never slough off. Discover the element of good in your enemy. And as you seek to hate him, find the center of goodness and place your attention there, and you will take a new attitude.

Dr. King reminds us of what Jesus was referring to when He gave the radical command to love our enemies. A way to love our enemies is to look for the good in them as people who are created in the image and likeness of God. It doesn’t mean we always agree with them or even like their ways, but by God’s grace, we are respectful and look for what we can agree on and how we can learn from one another. All human beings struggle with doing the right thing over succumbing to the wrong. As Paul says in Romans 7, “For I want to do good, but I do not. I do not do the good I want to do… I thank God I can be free through Jesus Christ our Lord.” The struggle to do good is always present, but thanks to God, the solution to the struggle is close by for the followers of Jesus. We are free by surrendering our divisive selves to the healing power of Jesus Christ, our Lord. Love looks for the good in another and builds relational bridges to better know each other.

At the beginning of his sermon, Dr. King reminded his listeners of the reality that there will always be someone who doesn’t like something about you. You may have been promoted at work over someone who felt more deserving, so now you are resented. How you talk or look may cause another to look down on you as less educated or, in contrast, envious of your elite education. Your skin color, where you grew up, where you work, and your religious and political affiliations may put you on another’s bad list without ever really getting to know you. Unless human beings intentionally tear down walls of prejudice and build relational bridges over lagoons of differences, fights will fester. Look for the good in others, and you will find good. 

Most of all, be grateful for the goodness of God. Knowing and appreciating how our heavenly Father loves us and others unconditionally is the basis of our looking for and finding goodness in another. If we are predisposed to only finding fault, that will be our relational default, with no room for grace and forgiveness. But when we discover a person’s charitable side, we can assume a greater potential for goodness. Start with a respectful tone of voice, calming body language, and a teachable spirit. When we disagree, bring out the good points in the other’s argument while humbly explaining your position. God sends the sun and rain to bless those who are right with Him and those who are not right with Him. Follow God’s example by being the light of love and the rain of respect, causing goodness to take root and flourish in everyone.

Master oneself

 For an overseer, as God's steward, must be above reproach. He must not be arrogant or quick-tempered or a drunkard or violent or greedy for gain, but hospitable, a lover of good, self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined. Titus 1:7-8

Mike Schmitz, a popular podcaster and leader, tells the story of a woman who once asked her father what kind of man she should look for as a marriage partner. The father’s answer? “Find a man who can fast.” Though this response surprised me when I first heard it, the longer I’ve sat with it, the more I’ve come to see the deep wisdom contained therein. Though there are many commendable virtues in a future spouse, the ability to direct one’s passions and desires, rather than to be directed by them, might be chief amongst them all. As Mike summarizes, this is the person who is able to say, “I know I have this impulse to one thing, but I have the ability to say no to myself. I know that I want to run, but I have the ability not to run. I know I want to cower back, but I have the ability to rise up.”

I thought of this example today as I read the words of Titus 1, especially the exhortation in verse 8 for  leaders to be “self-controlled, upright, holy, and disciplined.” When comparing translations of this verse which is a practice that I highly recommend. A line from a Greek translation known as the Apostolos stood out to me. Rather than the well-known phrase “self-controlled,” it instead says a leader must be “master of himself.”

One of the most persistent lies that we are told in our world today is that our desires are a window into our “true selves” and thus should be fulfilled in order to be truly happy. In response, I would simply say that some desires are good and meant to be fulfilled. When our lives are lived in submission to Christ and animated by the power of Holy Spirit within, we are filled with holy desires, seeking to give ourselves away in sacrificial service and love of others. Yet interspersed with these holy desires are the lingering passions of this world, lust, greed, envy, power, desires that promise to deliver freedom while only deepening our bondage. 

Wisdom is found in our ability to discern which desires get a “yes” and which are meant to receive a decisive “no.” And by living a disciplined and self-controlled life, we not only know in our minds how to tame and order our desires, we train our desires, mastering them lest they master us.

Heart on fire

Were not our hearts burning within us while he talked with us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us? Luke 24:32 

As the two disciples walked with Jesus, their hearts were confused by the grief of losing their leader. They mourned because their hope of a political savior had been killed on the cross. They misunderstood that Jesus Christ, the Messiah, did not come to overthrow the government but instead to reign as King over their lives. Jesus and His post-resurrection body were unrecognizable to the disciples. And spiritually, their eyes were still not open to seeing the real Jesus, their resurrected Lord and Savior.

As Jesus walked and talked with His disciples, He explained the true intent of His prophecies, which were forgiveness of sin and salvation to all believers. Through the power of His presence and the clarity of His teaching, the risen Jesus became real. Their hearts began to burn with conviction as they walked and talked, and God, through His grace and truth, revealed Jesus Christ as their resurrected Lord and Savior. Love is patient to explain the truth thoroughly. Once the truth of Jesus’ plan and purpose for you become personal your heart comes alive for God.

With a burning heart for God in the journey of faith, there comes a moment when our hearts are ignited by the fervent desire to know and serve God intimately. This burning passion, like a flame within us, drives us to pursue Him relentlessly, seeking His presence and experiencing His love in profound ways. When we encounter the Lord in a personal way, whether through prayer, worship, or studying His Word, our hearts can't help but burn with passion for Him. It's in those moments of divine connection that we realize how desperately we need Him and how fulfilling life is when we live in His presence. A burning heart for God is marked by a deep hunger for His Word, a fervent desire for prayer, and an unquenchable thirst for righteousness. It's a heart that longs to worship Him in spirit and truth, surrendering all to His will and His ways. 

Yet, maintaining a burning heart for God requires intentionality. We must continually fan the flames through regular communion with Him, guarding against complacency and distractions that seek to dampen our zeal. We must also surround ourselves with fellow believers who share our passion for God, encouraging and challenging one another to press deeper into His presence. Ultimately, a burning heart for God is not just a fleeting emotion but a steadfast commitment to love and serve Him wholeheartedly. It's a journey of transformation where our hearts become aligned with His, and His desires become our own. Jesus yearns for us to know Him truly. 

Are you following a political Jesus or a spiritual Jesus? A king you want to overthrow the government or a King to reign over your life? As you walk and talk with Jesus, ask Him to clarify who He is to you and what He has for you. Resist the story about a powerless Jesus that feeds your fears or, on the other extreme, puffs up your pride to seek power. Invite the Holy Spirit to burn in your heart with the conviction of God’s truth to humbly and joyfully obey Jesus. Let go of control and go to the Lord. Cultivate a burning heart for God, allowing His love to consume you completely and radiate brightly for all to see. Be filled with the Spirit to light your life in love to burn bright for Jesus, drawing others into the warmth of His divine comfort.

Powerless? I don't think so

For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places. Ephesians 6:12

During a recent coaching session with one of my clients, she shared some struggles and fears she’d been having for decades. “Why do I keep getting beat up by the insecurities and condemnation? I’ve been working on this area of my life for years.”

That’s when I felt something rise inside me. It was holy indignation. I was mad at the devil for attacking her and I wanted to invite her to take up her Sword and step into the battle to pummel the devil. Condemnation had been her constant companion for years, and it was time to do something different. 

As I shared fervently about the power all believers have over the condemnation of the enemy with her, I was reminded that Christ came to set us free, but that we must listen and believe Him. Human effort has value, but to fight the adversary and his deception, it takes more than human effort and human reasoning. It takes supernatural power.

When Jesus was led by the Spirit into the desert and the devil tempted him, Jesus didn’t fight the enemy’s lies with natural weapons. He didn’t fight with human reasoning or conversation. He fought the devil with spiritual weapons. He fought him with the Word of God.

The Lord has not left you and me powerless. If we feel continually or repeatedly attacked in the same way over the same incident, issues, or problems, the adversary has used deception to create bondage in your mind. It’s time to take up your shield of faith! It’s time to believe God and what He says. It’s time to use the Sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God to stand against the devil’s lies. 

Your battle, dear one, is not against flesh and blood. It’s against the enemy who wants to confuse, condemn, shame, and guilt you. God’s way, on the contrary, is a way of peace and power, but you must know and believe His Word. The Word is God’s standard against the Father of Lies. Do not allow him to continue to take advantage of you, confuse, shame, taunt, and mock you.  You are royalty. You are a son you are a daughter of the Most High King. You are God’s beloved, free from condemnation.

Inviting Christ into your life was just the beginning. Now, He is inviting you to step into your full authority and inheritance as an empowered child of God. He has given you authority to push back the influence of darkness in your mind and overcome by the power of the Holy Spirit. You belong to him. You are safe and secure in Him. Believe him. Take up your Sword.

“He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son. . .” (Colossians 1:13).

Discouraged yet not defeated

Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad? I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again—my Savior and my God. Psalm 43:5 

At times, we are deeply aware of the reasons behind our emotions. We are hurt or betrayed and thus understandably angry or frustrated. Perhaps more positively, a relational breakthrough or new job can result in a wave of relief, gratitude, and joy, crashing over us in the most delightful ways. 

However, we often find ourselves in situations where significant emotions may be present, yet their source or sources elude us. Though this can be a positive emotion that catches us by surprise, in my own experience, these elusive emotions are usually sources of pain or potential discouragement. We’re short-tempered and angry with those around us for no explainable reason. We’re pessimistic and doubtful even when we have plenty of reasons to be hopeful and encouraged. Or we’re profoundly sad without any clear reason to grieve. Perhaps, like the psalmist of old, you read these words and say to yourself, “Why am I discouraged? Why is my heart so sad?”

I once heard a wise Christian leader say that the vast majority of our disappointments in life come from unmet expectations. In light of our topic today, it’s important to realize that we often have implicit expectations in our lives that we’ve never consciously acknowledged to ourselves or discussed with others. When we find emotions present within us that seem to have come out of nowhere or lingered longer than we’d ever hoped, it’s helpful to ask ourself a version of this question: “What did I expect this season of life to look like?” 

In C.S. Lewis’ work, Perelandra, there’s a memorable scene in which The Green Lady discusses the difference between “the good expected” and “the given good,” noting that so often our Lord allows situations in our lives that we’d never have asked for or even wanted, yet if they are from him, then surely they are to be received as “good.” When we are sad or discouraged, and we don’t know why, we can rest in this truth, believing that God is always working for our good, joining our voice with Psalm 43 and saying, “I will put my hope in God! I will praise him again—my Savior and my God.

Speaking scars

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3

At times I am witness to people recovering from surgery. Every surgical procedure comes with scares or even abrasions as I have a scar from years ago that came from falling off my bike that still reminds me of the incident that occured more than 15 years ago. Every time I look at that scar, I reflect on what happened and  the experience of the fall, the pavement winning over my body and the hurt that went along with it. I also have the opportunity in looking at the scar to be reminded that I survived, and made it through the hurt and have healed.  It also reminds me of the scars that Jesus took to set me and you free.

What life-giving words scars remind us of the hurt and healing at the same time. To get to that conclusion we must shift our perspective. from the healing that comes from hurt. When we have a shift in perspective toward God’s truth, it takes away the painful feelings about our experience. When we believe Truth, we are indeed set free just as Jesus said in John 8:31-32: 

“To the Jews who had believed him, Jesus said, ‘If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.’”

Now, when I look at that scar, I think about the moments, the difficult, painful, soul-wrenching moments when Christ sustained me in the recovery/healing journey, and I think about His faithfulness.

I think about how He has spared my life so I can do more work for Him. 

I think about the precious, deep intimacy that has developed with Him, not in spite of what has happened to me, but because of what has happened to me.

That scar and all that has come with it has transformed my life and transformed me. The lessons have been profound, and I pray I never forget them. 

I wouldn’t have imagined that I could ever say this, but I’m thankful for the scar.

What has happened in your life? Have you experienced something tragic and hurtful that has left a scar on your mind, your emotions, or your skin? Accepting God’s perspective and His truth about it will set you free from the bondage of painful feelings about what happened to you and shift you to gratitude and joy.

Why? Because lingering, negative, painful feelings aren’t caused by what happened to us, although negative experiences are a doorway to emotional pain. However, emotional pain that won’t go away comes from how we internalize and view what has happened to us. (Read that again. That’s an amazing truth right there!) Praise God. He gave us painful emotions as red lights on the dashboard of our hearts to alert us as if to say, “Hey! There’s something here that needs God’s truth applied to it so that you can be emotionally healed and set free.” 

Many times, we believe it’s the experience that hurt us that we need to get over. We believe we need to overcome it somehow and go back and fix it. But what we really need is to change how we view what happened to us to be set free. We need to accept God’s truth. When we embrace His perspective, nothing about the experience that hurt us will change. But how we see it, will and that will lead to liberty. 

Ask Jesus to show you His truth about your painful experience, and the scars that came from it. Once you get His perspective, you’ll be able to consider what happened without debilitating pain, regret, or deep sadness and say, “Thank you, Lord, for what you have done in me and in my life, not in spite of my scar, but because of it. I’m thankful for that scar. How I praise you!”

“The Spirit of the Sovereign Lord is on me, because the Lord has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives” (Isaiah 61:1).

Power

Remembering you in my prayers, that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him…  and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might that he worked in Christ when he raised him from the dead and seated him at his right hand in the heavenly places.

Ephesians 1:16-17, 19-20

Powerless. That is how I feel sometimes, but that is not what God has given me. I often forget that my generous God has given me his power…the same power that he used to raise his son Jesus from the grave. 

So, why do I have seasons of feeling powerless? Because…Life can be difficult…even unbearable at times…health challenges, financial issues, rowdy, even rebellious children, work despair, fractured relationships, broken dreams…Yet my generous God gives me His powerful wisdom and grace to not just get through life but to thrive in life. One of His most powerful strategies (though not always intuitive or practical) is generous living. I ask myself, so, Lord, where do I start to experience the power of generosity? 

Generous living starts with a prayerful mindset of gratitude to the Lord. The power of generosity begins with gratitude to my generous God.

I learn to lean into being grateful for His blessings of life, relationships, and freedom to enjoy Him, freedom to be loved and to love. As my wife Rita reminds me often, who gets to do this? Who gets to live a life of generosity because of the radical generosity of our Savior and Lord Jesus Christ, who…

“Though he was so very rich, yet to help you he became so very poor, so that by being poor he could make you rich”  (2 Corinthians 8:9, TLB).

So, for us to better understand and acknowledge the power of God at work in our lives, we need to first look at how Jesus, when at the beginning of his ministry, was confronted by Satan to use power for building a kingdom on earth for Himself, refused and instead gave His power away to save the world for all who would believe and to build the kingdom of heaven…

“Again, the devil took him to a very high mountain and showed him all the kingdoms of the world and their splendor. ‘All this I will give you,’ he said, ‘if you will bow down and worship me.’ Jesus said to him, ‘Away from me, Satan! For it is written: ‘Worship the Lord your God, and serve him only” (Matthew 4:8-10).

Satan tried to tempt our Savior Jesus with power when He offered control over the kingdoms of the world… and then abruptly, Jesus called out the evil one to worship and serve God…the only One who has all power. 

The most powerful man who ever walked on the planet…Jesus Christ…gave away his power for the benefit of saving, healing, and blessing the world.

You have been given the power of God to carry out the purposes of God. His power is at work in you to will and to do His good pleasure. Use it, don’t abuse it; furthermore, use it for the good of others or lose it! Invest God’s generous gift of power through a life of generosity. Relational generosity finds joy in connecting those you know and love with one another. Financial generosity invests resources in funding the work of God’s kingdom. And generosity with your time is free to volunteer your expertise and experience to serve. Leverage power for the Lord

Win them back

If another believer sins against you, go privately and point out the offense. If the other person listens and confesses it, you have won that person back. Matthew 18:15

Relational conflict is an unavoidable part of life. We as are broken and imperfect people, and when my sickness bumps into yours, it is inevitable that we will struggle to see eye to eye. This plays itself out in every sphere of influence: work, home, and yes, even within the church. Though we are the people of God who are filled with the life of God, we are also works in progress who continue to struggle against sin, and we therefore must learn to navigate conflict, not if, but when it comes.

So often, in a heated moment of disagreement, our first and only instinct is one of self-preservation. Rather than being open to the possibility that our brokenness somehow contributed to this breakdown, we rush to our own defense, showing how we’ve been wronged, misunderstood, or falsely accused. When this posture is taken, no longer do we see the other as a brother or sister in Christ, but they transform, sometimes instantaneously, into an enemy and opponent, someone who must be wrong in order for me to be right.

In truth, this impulse can grow to the point that our only aim in the disagreement is to secure our innocence at any cost. Yet, in this confusion, the words of Matthew 18 invite us to consider another way. The aim and end of relational conflict is always the restoration of intimacy and trust. We engage in difficult conversations, not to win a battle but to win back a brother. Undoubtedly, this is hard work. And it is work that we will only engage if and when we learn to value and treasure the gift of a spiritual family, brothers and sisters in the faith that have been given to us by God for our mutual growth and flourishing in faith. 

When relationships in the church are viewed through this lens, we reject any outcome or solution that includes the loss of a brother or sister as an acceptable outcome. Let us always turn toward the other, even in times of pain and confusion, asking God to preserve and keep us in his love and in our mutual affection for one another.

No worry zone

Rejoice in the Lord always. Again I will say, rejoice! Philippians 4:4 

I am learning that worry and joy in the Lord cannot coexist; worry is not welcome where joy is the host. The same goes for being angry; a hot head cools under the influence of a calming, joyful heart. The Apostle Paul is writing to the church at Philippi to remind them not to allow the conflict from their differences to define their relationship. Different perspectives born from a variety of life experiences are meant to mold us more like Christ if we learn in love to value each other's uniqueness. Of course, sinful behavior needs to be addressed and corrected, but how many times could bad behavior have been avoided if a joyful focus on Jesus was the conversational starting point? Not naively ignoring the discomfort but keeping accusations at bay and choosing a better way. A joyful attitude elevates discussions in loving respect for others.

Why even fret for five minutes if we can start by rejoicing in the Lord? Rejoicing for how He provides for our wants and needs. Rejoicing for His Word, a personal love letter penned in Scripture, is a guiding light for our lives. Rejoicing in rich relationships gives us a healthy understanding that we are beloved by our heavenly Father. Rejoicing in our assurance of salvation in Jesus Christ. Rejoicing in hard times, knowing He walks with us through the shadows of suffering and the dread of death. Rejoicing is the Spirit’s remedy for healing. 

The act of rejoicing is not merely a fleeting emotion but a deliberate choice to find joy in God’s presence and promises. In doing so, we align ourself with a source of unwavering love, guidance, and grace. The word of God encourages believers to “rejoice always” (1 Thessalonians 5:16), highlighting the transformative power of joy in various circumstances. This practice fosters a grateful heart, cultivating contentment regardless of external conditions. Furthermore, rejoicing in the Lord strengthens our faith, serving as a reminder of His sovereignty and faithfulness. It provides a solid foundation for resilience in the face of challenges, as the joy rooted in God transcends temporal difficulties. In community, shared rejoicing creates bonds among believers, growing a sense of unity and encouragement. Ultimately, embracing joy in the Lord leads to a deeper understanding of divine love, peace that surpasses understanding, and a life marked by gratitude and spiritual abundance. I’ll close with Henri Nouwen’s insights into joyful persons:

Joyful persons do not necessarily make jokes, laugh, or even smile. They are not people with an optimistic outlook on life who always relativize the seriousness of a moment or an event. No, joyful persons see with open eyes the hard reality of human existence and, at the same time, are not imprisoned by it. They have no illusion about the evil powers that roam around, “looking for someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8), but they also know that death has no final power. They suffer with those who suffer, yet they do not hold on to suffering; they point beyond it to an everlasting peace. 

Indeed, joyful living happens in hard times and good times; looking to the Joy Giver.

unwavering faith and obedience

When Joseph woke from sleep, he did as the angel of the Lord commanded him: he took his wife but knew her not until she had given birth to a son. And he called his name Jesus. Matthew 1:24-25

In the town of Nazareth, Joseph, a righteous and just man, faced a bewildering revelation. His betrothed, Mary, was found to be with child before their marriage was consummated. This discovery rocked Joseph’s world, challenging his understanding of righteousness and faithfulness to God’s law. Joseph’s response unveils a narrative of unwavering faith and obedience in the face of uncertainty and social disgrace. The news of Mary’s pregnancy presented Joseph with a predicament. The law dictated severe consequences for such circumstances, and Joseph, a man of honor and integrity, initially grappled with the decision to quietly end the engagement. His heart was undoubtedly heavy, torn between his love for Mary and his commitment to God’s law. His inclination was to act discreetly, sparing Mary from public shame. As he waited on God, Joseph was instructed to take Mary as his wife, so he did, though not totally understanding how his wife was pregnant with the Son of God. 

However, in the midst of this turmoil, an angel appeared to Joseph in a dream, conveying a divine message: “Joseph, son of David, do not fear to take Mary as your wife, for that which is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.” This divine intervention challenged Joseph’s understanding of the situation, urging him to trust beyond his human reasoning. He was remarkably faithful and obedient to God’s call. Joseph, though initially torn and embarrassed by the situation, chose to trust God’s revelation in the dream. His obedience to the angel’s message showcased his profound faith and commitment to God’s plan. Joseph instantly obeyed God.

Joseph’s obedience was not passive acceptance but an active response to God’s call. He took Mary as his wife despite the public ridicule and potential shame. His actions were a testament to his deep faith in God’s sovereignty, trusting that the child Mary carried was indeed part of God’s divine plan for salvation. By obeying God’s instruction and taking Mary as his wife, Joseph demonstrated a remarkable faith that transcended his initial embarrassment and fear. He embraced his role as the earthly father of Jesus, providing protection, care, and guidance to the child who would one day become the Savior of the world. Your family background may be confusing or embarrassing; if so, you are not alone. God can bless what seems like a mess.

Joseph’s unwavering faith and obedience serve as an inspiration for believers today. His willingness to set aside his initial doubts and fears, choosing instead to trust and obey God’s plan, sets a profound example. Joseph teaches us the value of faithful obedience, even when faced with circumstances that challenge our understanding or social norms. As we reflect on the Christmas story, may we emulate Joseph’s unwavering faithfulness and obedience to God’s call in our own lives. Let us trust in God’s guidance, even when faced with uncertainty or societal pressures, knowing that He holds the ultimate plan for our lives and the world. Better to suffer misunderstanding and obey God than to try to please people and miss out on the Lord’s best. God’s better purposes are sometimes best understood after wisdom is proven right over time!

“But wisdom is shown to be right by the lives of those who follow it” (Luke 7:35).

What pleases God

For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light (for the fruit of the light consists in all goodness, righteousness and truth) and find out what pleases the Lord. 

Ephesians 5:8-10

The call of the believer is to learn by grace to walk in the light and life of Christ. This language of light and darkness is scattered throughout the word of God. We find it in the opening pages, with the Lord’s declaration over creation: “Let there be light!” (Genesis 1:3). It is found in the heart of Isaiah’s prophetic vision: “The people walking in darkness have seen a great light” (Isaiah 9:2). And it finds its fulfillment and true fullness in Christ himself, for as John reminds us, “In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind” (John 1:4). 

Life is found in Christ, so what falls to you and to me is to learn to find our life within his, to daily move further and further away from the darkness of our world and the darkness that lurks within our hearts and instead learn to rest and find our home within all that is good, righteous, and true.

Take note of Paul’s words in verse 10 of today’s passage: “find out what pleases the Lord.” This deceptively simple phrase contains within it an entire world of wisdom. First, it reminds us that there is, in fact, a way of life that pleases God. Though we live in a world that embraces a vision of freedom that allows for infinite “truths,” this is not the way of Christ. Freedom is found, not in our self-created visions of “the good life,” but in our ability to accept the boundaries and limitations of God as for our good and flourishing. This is true freedom, yet it so often feels counterintuitive to everything we see and hear, and so we must learn to follow the second point of wisdom contained within this verse: find out.

Yes, there is a way of life that pleases God, yet it is not always self-evident and it requires disciplined and intentional searching on our parts. Of course, we are only able to search because we have first been filled with the light of Christ. However, a room can be illumined yet people within that room can choose to ignore what they see. Let this never be true of us! Christ has illumined our hearts with the light of God’s kingdom. Choose today to live in that light, and seek out the way that leads to freedom and life eternal.