Tuesday, August 22, 2023

Emotional check

 Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. Ephesians 4:31-32

While the internet is a useful tool to share encouragement, kindness and love, have you also noticed there’s a whole lot-o hate online? People shaming one another, lashing out, and using sarcasm and bullying to put down one another. We as believers prayerfully realize that such division grieves God’s heart.

“How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity” (Psalm 133:1)!

Maybe we’ve been on the receiving end of someone’s unkind, or even blatantly nasty, sentiments, or perhaps we’ve gotten angry and lashed out at others now and then too. Regardless of which describes us, maybe we feel we need to do better; we need to either love more when we are attacked, or we need to be slow to get angry and slow to respond. 

The good news is that as believers in Christ we have the amazing honor of bringing peace into the world by how we relate to others, off and on social media. And (good news) our responses can bring us peace too. 

I would like to encourage you with some positive actions to take when online exchanges become unpleasant.   

The first thing to remember is not to allow our negative emotions to boss us around. The minute we allow any ungodly feelings to guide us in our response to someone who has been unkind or insulting, the other person immediately has control over us. And when they have control over us, we will not be productive in solving the relational problem at hand because our emotions will blind us to what is really happening. Additionally, we will also not be able to be a good witness for Christ. 

So, this means that when someone comes against you with an insult, or expresses an opinion with which you strongly disagree, you may feel angry, and you may want to lash out, but you must remember not to give your emotions permission to rule the show. 

James 1:19 says, “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry . . .”

When someone insults you or says something rude, your immediate response may be to quickly tap out a nasty message back and tell them how horrible, rude, uninformed, ignorant, or stupid they are. You may be tempted to share an “enlightening” sarcastic statement to put them in their place.

But this is not the way of the wise. Instead, being wise means being slow to answer. Being slow in this way will give you the space you need to decide what to do; it will help you clearly assess what the person means, and it will keep you from being blinded by strong ungodly feelings.  

So instead of immediately responding, get up out of your chair or move away from your phone and let the situation sit for a while. Things often make more sense later when we walk away so our emotions can cool down. While we are waiting to respond, ask God to provide you with insight into the situation and what the person said. Then ask Him what to say. Perhaps you can respond in such a way that brings light, wisdom, and grace into the interaction. Or, perhaps the Lord will show you that you shouldn’t respond at all as some people only want to wrangle and there can never be peace with them.

Always remember “emotions are like children. It’s OK to let them ride in the car with you, but do not let them drive.” or feelings are like a cold you catch them but eventually get over them, and if you don't it can eventually kill you. When it comes to dealing with negative online interactions, how true these statement are. 

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